Thursday, November 11, 2010

A loose argument for the hearts of men.


It's been a while so let us "catch up" and then get to the grit.
   
The Halloween Party was a smash success. Everyone had a great time and no one died. My costume was thrown together over a couple of hours and it turned out smashing. Ok? Sweet.

Now, my hateful readers, I'm going to tell you about my favorite author/book. I'm not going to bore you to death with some long essay but I do want to share why I think everyone should read this book and why I believe it is an important read: Simply put, I think it is a window into the heart of men. So if a man wants to see his soul written out for him on a page or a woman wants a deeper understanding of how men think and feel; I think this book will fill those needs.  Allow me to explain

For me, the single most inspiring author I have ever read is Ernest Hemingway.  His works renewed my interest in literature at a time when all I was reading were screenplays and comic books.  Hemingway’s writing appeals to me for various reasons. His “bare-bones” take on narrative and prose, his ability to convey emotion through understatement, and the fact that his writing seemed to be written specifically for men: often describing, in perfect detail, the pain and suffering a man can endure on the inside when not actively expressing it on the outside. There is no better example of this than in "The Sun Also Rises"



In “The Sun Also Rises” Hemingway’s style appealed to me, as a reader and a writer, for it’s simplicity. He didn’t go out of his way to be too wordy. He didn’t try and be flashy with his sentences. What appealed to me the most was the fact that he seemed to be very curt.  His prose was filled with understatement, often leaving most of what the characters felt and what they were doing to be described through their dialogue rather than narrative exposition. Even when exposition was used, it was short; like a small paragraph stating that a character walked from the hotel to a bar down the road to get a drink. He never took up too much space on the page, filling it with unnecessary details.  This minimalistic approach never left me feeling underwhelmed when reading his stories, however, because the action, the dialogue and even the written silences told the reader everything they needed to know.



The book felt as though it was written by a man for a man. Which is not to say that women cannot enjoy his writing, but I know Hemingway has been accused of being a somewhat misogynistic writer. He often painted women in a not-too-flattering light and at times painted them in an altogether negative one.  I have often argued that this is not because Hemingway hated woman but because, if his stories were any indication, he kept falling for the wrong ones.

His Character “Brett Ashley” in “The Sun Also Rises” is a prime example. In the story, Brett is a fairly independent, sexually free, outspoken woman. However, she is also rude, confused, she's an alcoholic, and the worst/best thing to come across the narrator’s life in ages. She is the bane of his existence because he is hopelessly in love with a woman who is nothing but bad news. He knows better than to let her in, and he see's her follies. The problem, of course, is that he cannot help but to be taken with her.  And again: it is something that is never explicitly stated within the book, but rather shown, that she emasculates him constantly. It's heart breaking to watch this man try everything in his power to push her from his mind to no avail.

I think every male friend of mine that I have shown this book to has agreed that it’s what the narrator isn’t saying about Brett Ashley that is the most heartbreaking. We get a real sense of how he is feeling towards her by what his actions are, and even more so by what he doesn’t say.  There is a quiet pain and a feeling of swallowed pride present in every action he makes. That feeling is underlying throughout the whole story: The feeling of quiet desperation a person gets when they can't help but to love someone that will do nothing but hurt them. It's omnipresent and always lingers in the back of my mind while reading the story. It's that feeling that breaks my heart every single time I read it. The man would do anything for her and through the story he does so much for her, from giving her a place to stay to saving her from her more self-destructive impulses, out of nothing more than his love for her.  It's terrible and romantic and heartbreaking all at the same time.

 I highly recommend it to anyone. And I recommend it even more to women because of this simple fact:
 All men of substance and heart have traveled this road before. Of this I am sure, or else I wouldn't have had so many heartfelt conversations with guys I know over the subject matter of this book. There is a shared deeply personal understanding of the pain Hemmingway conveys in this story.    
This is something that troubles me. Because I can't tell you how many times I have heard that "all the good men are gone" and that women can't "find the nice guys".  How is that possible?   I interact with these men on a daily basis. Often seeing them chasing the very women who will shatter their hearts. And you know what? I've, on occasion, seen some of these men turn into the womanizing assholes women despise simply because they have met one to many "Brett Ashley's". 
I'm not placing blame here, but I think it should be understood that we're not all heartless assholes and even some of us that act like it aren't: or at least have not always been.  I can share that secret with all of you. I can try to give you a better understanding of how men’s hearts work, but why should I if it's already published in one of the greatest works of all time? If you want to feel man's truest of pains or damn near live through it first hand, then read "The Sun Also Rises". 

And to any woman out there who hates a man at this time because of the things he's done or the hearts he's broken; be comforted by the fact that, no matter what, all men one day meet their own Brett Ashley.

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